Ten years ago I walked away from my career in dentistry. I had spent so much of my life investing in becoming a dentist that it was a very difficult move. One week after I quit for good, I found a blog post titled, 10 Reasons I Hate the Dentist. I decided to have a little fun and write a response to this fellow blogger.

Overnight 10 Reasons Your Dentist Probably Hates You Too went viral, reaching all corners of the world and getting translated into many different languages.

It was quite a ride, and the most incredible part of it was learning that I wasn’t alone. At a time when I thought I was the only dentist in the world who didn’t love the work I chose for my forever career, I learned that so many others felt similarly.

So many other dentists; hygienists; dental assistants; front office personnel; and spouses, siblings, and children of dental professionals could relate to my words.

You chimed in and shared your reasons the “hate” runs both ways in this complex relationship. On the 10th anniversary of this blog post, I’m highlighting your voices. This is what YOU had to say…

10 MORE Reasons Your Dentist Probably Hates You Too

1. You start my Monday morning with, “I’d rather have another baby than get this crown done!”

Go right ahead lady… babies last a whole lot longer than this next hour of your life, so that seems extreme to me. Oh, and good morning to you too! This is going to be fun.

2. You show up to my office and stink up the whole building.

I’m not talking about a little sweating or bad breath I can detect when I have my nose 3 inches from your mouth. It’s no big deal if you’ve come from the gym. I get that we all have lives. I’m talking about smelling like cat pee, severe BO, or smoke that permeates throughout the entire office and offends other patients as well. No mask can defend any of us from such an odor. I’m doing you a favor in telling you this. I promise, it’s not only the dental office who notices it.

3. You think it’s okay to show up without brushing your teeth because the hygienist is going to clean them for you.

And you’re proud about it too. You inform us that you didn’t brush because you knew we were going to clean them or because you didn’t have time. What I want to say is, “that’s alright, I don’t have time to wash my hands.” I’m sure you wouldn’t be too thrilled about that, would you? And by the way, why is it that one will ALWAYS clean their exit after use, but rarely their entrance? Would you visit your proctologist without wiping first?

4. You trust a random person sitting behind a desk at the insurance company more than you trust me, someone you’ve actually been in the same room with, let alone had a long term relationship with.

You say things like, “My insurance won’t pay much on a crown – just do a big filling.” Do you realize you are letting some person behind a desk that hasn’t seen your mouth diagnose and treatment plan what dentistry you need? Not only do you let them decide what treatment you need, but you also let them dictate when you do it. You know you’ve needed work all year, but you wait to call us on Dec. 20th and want to get in and use your benefits before the end of year. Then you get mad at US because we don’t have immediate availability for you when you call right during the busiest holiday season of the year.

5. Parents, you threaten your kids with dentistry as a punishment, or you talk about how much you hate the dentist.

I’ve seen you threaten your kids with a shot when they misbehave or hold up the instrument packets and taunt them thinking it’s funny! I mean, really parents?! No wonder your children are scared of us! Don’t make your kids scared of the dentist. You are traumatizing your child even if you think you’re joking. This makes it harder on me, your child, and yourself.

Watch how you frame it too. I once heard a mom say, “It’s okay dear, it’s totally normal to have teeth ripped out of your face. Look, mommy has had it done lots of times!” Your kid’s attitude about the dentist only reflects yours. Is this what you really want for your kids? You want a lifetime of fearing the dentist which could lead to bigger consequences if they stay away?

Just stoppit!

6. And furthermore, parents, you expect your kids to to take responsibility for their teeth and their actions, but you don’t take any responsibility for supervising them.

You say things like, “I don’t know why my 4-year-old has cavities in every tooth. He SAYS he brushes his teeth!” Or, “I can’t get him to stop drinking pop. He doesn’t LIKE water.” YOU are the parent! It’s your job to teach them and guide them. If you don’t want them drinking soda, them don’t buy it for them! If you want them to brush their teeth and not just lie about it, it’s your job to watch them do it, encourage it, and be positive about it! They’re kids. Of course they don’t feel like brushing their teeth. If you and they take care of their teeth, there will be a smaller chance they will ever have to go through anything painful in my office, and you’ll all get to avoid extensive and expensive treatment.

Oh, and one more parent thing… I don’t really care about your marital status. The sign in the waiting room and form YOU signed says whoever brings the child is financially responsible. It’s not MY problem your ex-husband won’t pay his child’s bill, so please don’t yell at my staff when they call looking for money that you owe me for work I did to help your child.

7. You bring your “little darlings” in with you for us to babysit during your appointments.

Come on, get a sitter already!!! Would you bring your cranky child with you to any other hour long important meeting, or appointment? Have you ever tried to work on a live human being with a colicky baby screaming the whole time 2 feet away? I’m trying to take good care of you, and your 3 year old keeps asking, “Are you done yet, Mommy?”

And don’t begin breastfeeding your baby while I’m in the middle of doing a root canal on you. I know things happen, and you can’t always get childcare for emergency situations, but not only is your child on your lap shaking the entire chair while I’m doing very precise work, but when you’re done, I don’t want to see your exposed body parts staring back at me. All of this distraction only makes it harder to do my best work for you.

8. You don’t take responsibility for your own health and your own choices, but instead you blame the dentist.

You complain that your last dentist was so horrible, that it made you stay away for many years before going back. Notice… “it made you stay away,” not “you chose to stay away.” If you went to a bad restaurant and didn’t like the food, would you stay away from ever eating at another restaurant? This is your choice. Of course, like in any field, there are some bad ones, but there are plenty of great dentists out there too. And if you seem to only ever find bad dentists time and time again, what’s the common denominator here?

9. I see you outside of the office, and you feel the need to tell me all about your teeth even though you are a complete stranger who is not even my patient.

It’s amazing how upon finding out I am a dentist, you pop out your dentures in the middle of the grocery store while describing every past experience you have ever had with dentists. Or you feel the need to share all of your horrible dental experiences as a child. You go on and on about how “dentists used to be so horrible, making you wear that awful rubber thing. Thank goodness they don’t do that anymore.” I won’t bother telling you that rubber dams in fact ARE still used, especially for certain technique-sensitive procedures that won’t work without it. I know the whole explanation will be lost on you. You don’t care that we use them to actually get YOU the best outcomes, instead of trying to torture you. You don’t care, you just want to vomit out all of your dental stories on me.

10. I tell you something is wrong with your tooth, but you don’t want to do anything about it because “the tooth doesn’t bother” you.

We can’t always feel things that are going wrong in our bodies. You can’t feel high blood pressure or early cancers. Would you let your blood pressure stay high or a tumor grow because it’s not bothering you? This is the same concept. Of course your heart health or something like cancer are a much bigger deal than needing to have a tooth pulled, but they’re all connected. Despite the fact that teeth are in your mouth, they are still considered body parts. Not only that, but your mouth IS connected to the rest of your body. If your mouth isn’t healthy, that affects your whole health. If the problem were on your forehead and you had to look at it in the mirror everyday, would you do something about it then?

And bonus #11… You say “I’m so afraid of needles,” while showing off the details of your full arm tattoo.

Last I checked, I’m pretty sure there was a needle involved in getting your tattoos. You can sit through an entire procedure done with needles, but one shot in the mouth that lasts 30 seconds sends you over the edge. Do you value being an art canvas more than being able to smile at others or enjoy a good meal?

Ahhh… I feel much better now.

If this isn’t you, I am sure your dentist loves you. You are probably the bright spot of his/her day. You should feel great knowing that you are a bright spot in their career. You are the reason they keep going. It makes you wonder, how do you behave when you go to the dentist? And most importantly, are you making it easy for your dentist to give you the kind of care you want and deserve?