In 2018 I began connecting with other dental professionals who made career changes after becoming unhappy in their dental careers. I began an interview series I called Celebrating New Beginnings and wanted to showcase real people like you and me who were able to shift. Mark was one of the first dentists I interviewed. As an unhappy dentist, career change became the only option for him. I hope you enjoy Mark’s story and find inspiration in it.
This week we showcase a wonderful dentist who went for it! He knew it was time to change when he found himself wishing away his life in order to reach retirement. He had no idea what to do next, but the one thing he did know was that he didn’t want to reach 65 years old, only to look back and regret his life. Help me welcome my next guest, Mark!
Mark is 38 years old and is from the UK. He practiced dentistry for 11 years before he decided make a career change and turn in the handpiece for a life in real estate. You’ll see Mark is very happy and is doing what he loves!
Me: Mark, tell me why did you decide to practice dentistry?
Mark: At school we were asked to decide what we wanted to do at university or for a job. I felt pressured at age 15 to decide upon a vocation to try to set myself up for a career. It was at a time when everybody asks you what you want to do in life. I was quite academic. I enjoyed science and was interested in medicine. Dentistry was mentioned and that set the ball rolling.
It’s amazing to think that we are expected to make such a significant life decision at such a young age. It’s no wonder many of us end up wanting a career change later in life. What was your dental school experience like?
I enjoyed dental school. I have to say this was the best bit of dentistry for me. Learning lots of medical science, pharmacology, biochemistry, anatomy, etc. I found all of that really interesting. I made great friends and felt part of something really quite special. However by the end of dental school I had started to realize something quite important. Teeth really didn’t interest me.
Despite some of the challenges with school, being in that community was a highlight for a lot of us. It sounds like once you realized this wasn’t your passion, you had already finished school. Tell me about your first job out of school.
My first job was a compulsory year in a practice in the UK called vocational training (VT). You needed to do this if you wanted to work in the NHS in the future. This is where the rot set in very quickly.
All the training had not prepared me for real life practice. Suddenly I needed to work at speed seeing 35-40 patients a day and I felt very alone. My boss who was supposed to mentor me was next to useless and the practice was poorly run. As it was only a year’s position I persevered and thought things would get better in my next job.
That’s a tough way to get started. Those early years of practice can make or break a future in this career. How has your relationship with dentistry been over the years?
After my VT year I joined another practice. I had to start a patient list from scratch. Initially working really hard to do this. To everyone around me I looked successful. I had a good job and it was enabling me to earn a great wage. However, I soon started to suffer with headaches or aches and pains that just wouldn’t go. You ignore these signs for a while just assuming you are prone to headaches.
Then at age 27 driving in to work I decided I had to pull over. I stopped the car and burst in to tears. It was not just crying– it was an uncontrollable outburst of emotion. Basically my job in dentistry was making me ill. I was trying so hard to just put up and shut up with dentistry that my body had to tell me otherwise, that you can’t do this.
Anyway after a pretty rubbish year of depression, I managed to pull myself along again to carry on in the same job, thinking thank god that year was over. Also at this point I started to wish I was aged 65 and retiring. I was basically wishing my life away.
Amazing. Doing this was making you sick, and your body forced you to pay attention what was really going on. This is not uncommon, as we saw in my earlier interview with David. In a way it’s great that you could read those signals. I imagine there are people out there who don’t have that awareness yet. What happened next?
I decided to drop a day of work. Four days will obviously make it all better. Well, it helped a little. I managed another few years doing four days a week but even then I was still dreading going in to work and feeling extremely trapped by not knowing what else I could ever do in life.
I realized I had no other qualifications to suddenly switch careers.
Then another few years pass and I decide to drop another day. Three days of dentistry a week, surely this will help. I felt guilty to my patients who then had to wait longer for appointments and there was pressure to try to fit more people in to my 3 days a week. By now I really knew I didn’t just dislike my job, I absolutely hated it with a passion. I would ask around my dental friends to see how they felt. There were some who could relate but others who were okay or enjoyed dentistry. I might add they all looked miserable to me!
Ha! I had a very similar path, eventually going down to 3 days a week. That really is the life, so when you see you’re even suffering with that schedule, it has to be a clue that maybe it’s time for a career change. Did you notice any judgment or lack of understanding from your colleagues?
I was lucky to have worked with some really understanding colleagues. They could see I was not happy, and my practice manager who wanted me to stay tried to make my schedule as nice as possible. I think there was more judgment from the world of non-dentists. I was only working 3 days a week, and for some people that sounds blissful. I was often being reminded by people how fortunate I was.
So what to do? Well time had passed, I was a little older and I looked at myself. How could I do this to age 65? Would I even make it to 65? I realized that if I continued I was basically going to have a very miserable life.
Hearing your story is so reminiscent of mine on so many levels. The one thing that drove me more than anything else was a vision I imagined of myself. I imagined myself at 65 years old, sitting on the edge of my bed, preparing to get up and start yet another day. I saw myself with my head hanging low, shaking my head, wondering where my entire life had gone, and ashamed that I wasted my whole life doing something that I didn’t like. Seeing that vision of yourself can be very powerful. Looks like that motivation worked for both of us.
True. So 11 years into my dental career I went on holiday. I decided to write a list of things I disliked about my job and another list of people I know who had changed aspects of their lives and were content. The big stumbling block was MONEY. No decision could be made. However after one day back at work from my holiday I found myself writing my letter of resignation. It actually wrote itself.
Wow! That’s amazing. You just did it! That took a lot of courage. I would love to hear more about how that went down.
I think it came as a surprise to a lot of people. It inevitably caused a lot of people to ask me what was I going to do? What plans had I got? This was the first time in my life when I had no answer to this. Up until this point my life had been mapped out. It was a step into the unknown but this brought with it a feeling of excitement.
What have been your biggest challenges?
My biggest challenges have been making a change to my life. It would have been much simpler if I didn’t have the feelings I did and could have just got on with the job. How simple it would have been if I had enjoyed dentistry. But I have no regrets.
I completely agree. If only… it’s a great career. Those of us who are unhappy in dentistry wish we felt differently. Life would be much easier that way. What are you doing now?
I now do property development, so I buy houses and renovate them to sell. It is very hands-on but also love the organizational side of it.
Obviously this career choice requires you to be able to buy a house to do it and I’m very fortunate that I had invested well when I was earning as a dentist. I am my own boss, which I love. I felt like my own boss when I was a dentist and probably would struggle being answerable to anyone in a corporate company, as I have never really had to do this.
That sounds like a really fun career, but seriously, Mark… can you get out of my head? I felt the same way! Being a dentist gives us such a sense of autonomy that is hard to imagine working for anyone else. It certainly didn’t interest me at all. I think that’s another requirement a lot of dentists have that keeps them stuck when they think of what else they could do. How did you decide to go into property development? Was it your first choice? Were you always attracted to it?
I have always had a passion for all things property related. I really enjoy the process of renovation. Making something look really nice from a humble beginning. It’s very rewarding. In terms of other careers, initially I struggled to think of careers I could do or be qualified to do.
But there is a world out there away from dentistry and sometimes you only need to open your eyes a bit wider to see possibilities beyond dentistry.
What is one tip you would share with anyone wanting to make their own career change?
Look at yourself. What advice would you give someone else if they were miserable in a career? Treat yourself with that same empathy you would offer others. Life can be short, make the most of it. I went to see a career advisor a few years ago and this really helped. She could see my passion in property and basically it felt like she gave me permission to leave a good career. It’s amazing how many people want change.
Sometimes that permission is all we need to get started.
And this is where I can thank you, Laura. Around about my lowest point in dentistry I was fortunate enough to type “I hate Dentistry” into the internet and found your article on why patients hate the dentist. I delved a little deeper in to your blog and found your journey to be a few streets ahead of mine. You’ve done the hard work in writing the blog and sharing your thoughts. I really can’t thank you enough.
Aw, thanks. (blushing) That means the world to me, (and I swear, that was unsolicited!) I love doing this, and I say it all the time, but people like you helped me through my career change as much as you’d say I’ve helped you. I think this makes all the difference in the world—having that support. That connection really makes it easier.
Now for a little non-dental talk. What is your favorite movie?
The Shawshank Redemption– I think there must be a common theme here. Escaping from a life sentence.
Look at that clever analogy! Every man I’ve ever met loves that movie. What is a silly or interesting fact no one knows about you?
One of my patients once said to me that she’d had a hysterectomy done on her tooth. I tried to explain it was called an apisectomy. She didn’t believe me and said she’d had it done by a very experienced dentist. I guess her previous dentist’s talents lay deeper than mine.
Ha! I once had a woman in dental school tell us she had been pregnant for the past 15 years. Not with 15 different pregnancies, but with one! These patient stories are great. Last question. What do you do for fun and/or creativity?
I love holidays, especially road trips. Every year my partner and I drive through Europe usually visiting 4-5 countries in 2 weeks. Visiting different cities, experiencing the culture and the food and seeing as many sights as I can. I am always planning a holiday.
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